lilgivenchyprincess:

Me shopping: *would Kanye let Kim wear this??*

gothpapiuwu:

me:*fails a quiz*

drake: iā€™m just sayin you could do better

me:*studies harder graduates valedictorian and cures cancer*

bukkakehokage:

girl: spank me daddy

me: I am not ready to be a father

(Source: http)

merasmus:

son *puts a hand on your shoulder* son sometimes *puts another hand on your shoulder* Son sometimes things are *puts another hand on your shoulder* son you just gotta *puts another hand on your shoulder* son

(Source: beeblejuice)

jesus: i died on the cross for your sins
me: aint nobody tell u to do that tho

toxicwinner:

art girl seduction (do nthing but exist and wait for men to think u weirdhot

Vice: Watch us huff jenkem and discuss porn with members of ISIS at an underground vaporwave party

(Source: oddbagel)

(Source: hrselover5)

yzma:

'babe, what's the safety word'

'jacobs by marc jacobs for marc by marc jacobs in collaboration with marc jacobs for marc by marc jacobs'

(Source: maryjblige)

me: why are you cheating on me
harry: i dont know you
me: shit

benicetodogs ur such a sweetheart u kno šŸ’—

(Source: himmelskbomb)